Some Hearts

Feeling better today. Last night we used the doppler again. I had been a little worried because when we've used it the heart beat has been pretty low and not steady. We haven't been able to get a clear reading. But last night we got a good reading of 136. Pretty low but in the range of 125-160. Lazy baby. I'm hoping that at our doctor's appt tomorrow she does an ultra sound or at least uses a doppler. Maybe then we can get a better reading. Looking forward to our appt!

I'm also looking forward to Saturday as I'll be 14 weeks and officially in the 2nd trimester! the nausea has decreased the last 2 days. I'm a little nauseous in the morning but then i'm great all day. I only get nauseous if i wait too long to eat, and then sometimes late at night. I must have snacks every couple of hours. If I feel hungry, then I feel nauseous. Which is starting to happen now [reaching for granola bar]. I've also notice my appetite is back and I can eat more. I was so sick before that I hardly ate. Now I need normal portions to fill me up. Guess I shouldn't be surprised if I've gained a few pounds at my appt tomorrow. The heart burn hasn't been bad this week. I've started incorporating spicy food into my diet again [i missed it too much!] and so far so good! So things are looking up!

Hormone overload

Ever feel like you don't know whats wrong with you? I do! Like now. I don't know if it's the beginning of heartburn, or I'm getting hungry, or I'm full on water, or my stomach just hurts, or what!!! I hate this feeling. 15 more minutes to go at work. Then I can go home and have a pre-dinner snack. I really gotta go out and buy some sort of healthy snacks to keep at work. I just don't know what. Any ideas?

Saturday I took our fetal heart monitor to my parents house so they could listen to Baby G's heart. I found it faster this time and everyone gathered 'round in amusement. Good times. :)

And the beat goes on

Last night I thought I was catching the flu. I felt so crappy and tired. Everything hurt. On top of that I had been way way nauseous all day [and some] with terrible heartburn. I definitely wouldn't have made it at work in the afternoon if I would have done a full day yesterday. On the bright side I woke up feeling way better today. I hardly slept because the wind kept making our window shake and that kept waking me up. I don't go back to sleep so easily these days. With that in mind, I wasn't nauseous when I woke up and I my heartburn was gone. So far so good at work too. Although I think I've been staring at the computer too long and need a break. I feel a little dizzy.

In other news, I've been thinking about finding out the sex of this kid. Everyone keeps asking us if we are. I sort of don't want to. I'd like to be surprised at delivery at least once. But then I think that no matter when we find out, whether at deliver or an ultrasound, it'll still be a surprise. I don't know. It doesn't help that G wants to find out asap. I don't mind that not being able to buy stuff or decorate to a specific gender. I don't care what we have! I'd be happier with gift cards as gifts! We'll see as time progresses. I think it's just nice to be in a place where we can think about this stuff. So what do you guys think? Would you find out the sex?

Back to work

This is my second day back at work. Been going good, but I have some massive heartburn today. Sucks because I didn't come prepared with my tums or mylanta. I'm learning my lesson though. As Juno said "it's radiating in my knee caps."

The nausea continues. I've had it pretty bad for 3 days. I usually get a day of relief thrown in, but no luck. I keep thinking that that magical day when the nausea disappears is just around the corner, but I'm slowly losing hope. I'm usually on a message board over at The Nest Baby, and sadly most of the girls keep complaining well past the first trimester about still being sick. I'm sure that'll be me. The one wish I do have is that sick feeling my apartment constantly gives me goes away. Please go away....

Allergic to my home

Gosh this sucks. To have such a strong aversion to your own home! So I have been spending about 4 days out of the week at my moms house. I sleep there and everything. Our apartment has just been making me way way too sick. I can't stand the smell of the place. Even when it has just been cleaned. The craziest part is that i'm gagging just typing about it! I can't even talk about my apartment without gagging! WTF?!! I mean every one tells me they have had 1 thing that they really couldn't stand during the "morning sickness" stage. I guess for me that 1 thing is our apartment.

Well, I actually have 2 things. Refridgerators. I can't open a fridge without throwing up. Not sure what it is. Maybe all the smells.....or the food. I just can't. So being alone is very hard for me right now. I can barely feed myself. I mean how ridiculous is this!?!?! Sometimes I feel ashamed. I feel so bad for G because he basically has to take care of me and make all my meals. Poor guy. I feel so handicap. Seriously praying this only last 1 more week. PLEASE!

Still have a heartbeat!

What a month we have had. I have now been on bed rest for 1 month and 4 days!!! And it sucks!! But anything to keep this baby's heart beating...right?

I started bleeding the day after our first doctors appointment. SO i was immediately put on bed rest. The bleeding would happen once and then go away, but it would happen at least once every week. So the bed rest continued straight thru the holidays. After New Years I bled again for no good reason and was put back on my strict bed rest [only get up to pee and shower]. I then bled again the following week. At our 2nd doctors appt we found out everything was still progressing perfectly. We saw a bigger baby in the ultrasound and everything looked great.

I spent a good month being scared shitless for what could've been. It's so scary to go thru this. I try not to stress because I know it's no good for the baby, but still....you can't help but be scared. I mean why so much blood? And where is it coming from?! I am now a week out since I last bled, and assuming I don't anymore I'll be able to go back to work. I pray that's the case. I'm so tired of beds.

On top of all of this my morning/all day sickness has not subsided yet. I am extremely nauseous 24/7. And the worst part is I don't throw up. Sometimes I wish I did so I could have those 30 min. of relief. But don't get me wrong, I have thrown up. Mostly in the mornings when I first wake up or late at night. But not everyday.

I'm also extremely allergic to my apartment. Sad part is I'm not kidding. I soon as I get near the front door or smell the inside, I start gagging uncontrollably until I finally throw up. It's bad. It started just being ........ ok........ I just gagged typing this out. SERIOUSLY! That's how bad it is!! It's driving me insane!! But I was saying - It started as an aversion to my kitchen and the sight of food. Any food. And now it is my entire apartment that makes me sick. Poor G tries to clean and clean and nothing works. Well it's gotten so bad that I have been spending a good 4 days out of the week at my parents house. It's nice because nothing makes me sick here and my mom is around all day to get me food and what not. But poor G. He didn't get it at first, but now he knows I'm not nuts. Everyone tells me all women get a serious aversion to something, mine is my apartment. :(

So I sit here and pray that my morning sickness does not last past the first trimester. And then I pray for a healthy and happy 200 more days. I'll be honest - the miracle of life is fascinating, but this part sure hasn't been fun.

Hopefully now I'll also have time to blog more often. I have to steal my brother's laptop to do it, so it doesn't come easy.

Feels good to write this out. I feel like I'm gonna be a mom!! :D